They did the nuchal translucency screening and all looked good. We're having them do the additional blood testing and we'll go back at 18 weeks for the anatomy scan. So far, all is well and there are no signs of omphalocele or anything else at this point.
Now to be quite honest, I really feel like this time around, if something abnormal comes up, yes we will be sad but I don't think it would be as devastating as our initial news about Harper was. For Harper's outlook to have been so negative and for us to now have the amazing daughter we have, I know that God is totally, 100% in control. I find it hard to pray that this baby will be 100% healthy and born without flaw because I am so grateful for the "flaws" that Harper was born with. Not only do I know that they made us better parents but I know that they strengthened our marriage. My prayers tend to be more that this baby will be perfect for our family. That we will learn and grow with this baby like we did with Harper but in different ways. Maybe that's just the consequence of having a child born under abnormal circumstances but I don't expect perfection. Knowing what I know through the experience the last year brought, I will love this child regardless of any "imperfections" it might have and will love those imperfections with all of my heart.
I don't know if I'll be able to go into a check-up or even through delivery without expecting to hear some kind of news that things aren't totally "normal" but I don't feel anxious or scared about these feelings. They are more matter-of-fact. Chances are, we'll sail through this pregnancy and know what it's like to bring home a baby that's just days old. Actually, that scares me more than anything! I don't have a clue about what to do with a newborn!
I wonder, do you other mothers of babies born under abnormal circumstances, whether it's a birth defect, prematurely or anything else, find this to be true???
4 comments:
What precious and heart-felt words you have written. With tears streaming down my face I read this last post and felt the strength and courage that will carry you through this lifetime of being a mother.
Hold tight to this faith and "abnormal" no matter what the circumstances or the stages of life will always melt into God's best.
With all my love,
Mom
So happy for you guys. Such an amazing way to view pregnancy and your unborn little one!! The Lord has blessed you with such a precious little girl. (See why I love being a NICU nurse??)
My middle daughter has a very rare form of dwarfism that was given a lethal diagnosis. She wasn't supposed to make it more then 12 hours and this month she will turn 5. When I got pregnant with my youngest, I was waiting for the other shoe to drop so to speak. When it didn't and everything was "normal" it was an adjustment. I completely understand where you are coming from. I also understand the fear of bring home a newborn. I have an older child too but after having a child in the NICU to bring one home right away is scary.
I share your sentiments Brooke! I was just telling someone the other day the same thing. I feel like when we have another baby we won't have a clue as to what it will be like to take a newborn home. We've always had a doctor or nurse looking over our shoulder. You guys will do great...I would think after having gone through what you've gone through a "normal" pregnancy, birth and newborn will be a breeze! Our thoughts and prayers are with you!
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